uncomplicated. we both know i can be unpredictable.

My three biggest fears(In order)-

1. being alone forever
2. failure
3. heights
   

So, I applied to George Mason a few days ago. I am not sure why? I guess it's because I can't apply to just one school. VCU is my main choice, after visiting a friend during winter break who goes their when he was home, he always had seemed to really like it. Also, Richmond is far enough away that I won't have to deal with anyone from past high school's they are all set on going to Towson or University of Maryland. I am applying other places because when I wanted to apply just to three schools my friend Amy was like "... I guess that is an okay start" So now I have a list of about six I plan on applying to. I don't like when other people tell me what the fuck to do with my life, especially when they aren't being supportive about it. Yesterday I was talking to Jamaal who I miss a lot, he already has gotten offers from three colleges, I told him what I wanted he has been the only one to sound super supportive of me... everyone else kind of dipped out, once I switched schools... 

I feel like if I don't get into VCU biggest fear number #2 will be coming true... My sister always has had her entire life planned out she knew which college she wanted to go when she was in 6th grade, and she is now at that college... happily ever after, her only words of wisdom to me where "You aren't going anywhere Shannon no one will want you." The first day of my internship my cousin took me shopping at pentagon city and I thought damn maybe the old bitch is finally changing ways, just to get lectured in the car about how she only took me out because she thought I was full of shit & made up my internship, & how awful I am for having to go private school, she topped it off with "Yeah right next year you will still be living at home, You are going to college." She's such a cunt, maybe that's why ever since I was 10 I used to tell my parents, "I don't want to be Beth when I grow up." 40 years old never married, or had even been in a long term relationship. My favorite thing to do is prove people wrong, so I hope I can do it! 

Today, I am going to the Jammin Java to see the Downtown Fiction. Scene Trash Magazine is realising issue #29 at the show. Static Magazine is also releasing it's first issue at the show. (I am not sure if either of them know they are both being released today..) I am happy to be a writer/ photographer for both magazines! (the Downtown Fiction is in both magazine, those boys have the best personalities) After the Jammin Java I am going to Jenn's house and we are watching movies and eating cupcakes and I am spending the night down in Woodbridge. Tomorrow we are going to MOSHington DC to see USHER & Beyonce! that shit is more legit than warped tour. 

I am grateful to not be sick anymore, that 103 degree fever and ear infection and whatever else was plaguing me is gone. Jonathan got me a hoodie yesterday its super comfy. All I wear are oversized clothes with spandex and boots, Pullovers and dunks when im lazy!